It’s August. And aside from blogging every day, I have also vowed to spend as much time on the beach as possible. I live the freelance life, which affords me the luxury of making my own schedule and arranging my own priorities. I’m not saying it’s easy working for yourself but the arrangement does have its perks.
Case in point, when a client postpones your meeting for the umpteenth time and you are basically caught up on work (perhaps a little ahead of the game) you can decide to just say FUCK IT and go to the beach. Pull up a beach chair, spray on some sunscreen and recharge your crystal necklace in the salt water.
And that’s basically what I did today. I have a sunburnt stomach to show for it and memories of enjoying the Atlantic Ocean on one of the rare days the water is actually warm enough to enjoy.
I did a little writing on the beach and wrote out a gratitude list because honestly, what better place to start? I also read this and realized this is exactly what I do:
THIS IS TOTALLY TRUE! Now look, say what you want about Glennon Doyle (a Christian mommy blogger who wrote a book about her eating disorder and addictions and saving her failing marriage only to fall in love with Abby Wambach of lesbian Olympic soccer fame). The two are cute to watch on Instagram. I read her book, Love Warrior, cause I’m a sucker for stories of redemption. And ever since then I’ve appreciated that she’s a white lady who uses her platform for good, even if it does border on white savior complex. We need more of her out there.
Anyhoo. It’s the truth. Whenever I am in conflict I want to do the EXACT OPPOSITE of whatever I am railing against. Like the dichotomy is astounding. I love pitting one thing against another. It’s either or, black or white, east or west, this one or that one, there’s no gray, no nuance, no shading allowed.
WELL NOW. Isn’t that extreme? No wonder I’m EXHAUSTED.
Today’s beach time also brought up the following:
- I can’t have anyone telling me what my reality is.
- My perceptions, insights and experiences are mine and they are valid.
- No one can name anything for me. You can help facilitate the process of better understanding; you can serve as a sounding board; you can bear witness; you can hold up a mirror but don’t explain to me what I’m experiencing because you don’t freaking know.
- I may be slightly angry. Perhaps it’s part of the grief process?
So that’s what I learned today. Also sitting at the shore and letting waves ripple past you is really a thing I encourage all people to try. It helps to clear energy.
[Cool “Fuck Everything” graphic from Kitschmix on the Internet]