Lessons From the Road

Or perhaps they should be classified as observations, validations, or hallucinations…

*** The better you eat, the better you feel (like, duh). So if you eat a pretty garnished plate full of fat-filled chicken platter and cheesecake at lunch because that’s what they are serving, chances are you will end up feeling like sludge (not to mention very round).

*** People at conferences like to drink. heavily and flirt incessantly. ah, the art of the schmooze. And if you’re a girl surrounded by a bunch of business dudes away from their wives and significant others, you’re the party. somehow it took me extra long to figure this out.

*** That when sleeping in a king sized bed, I will still always choose one side.

*** Matching polo shirts, no matter what you are trying to promote, market or scam, is always a bad idea.

*** Engagement rings/bands of gold to me look like dog collars. Wowza! I mean, shit, I like the bling and don’t have anything against people in love (mazel tov!) but it rubs me as a status-oriented territorial symbol of a crumbling institution.

*** When you are in a public place such as an airport, there is almost always one idiot sneezing or coughing robustly and repetitively without covering themselves appropriately.

*** In airport waiting areas, why is it that the one who you notice as being the most annoying ends up sitting by you in a small old-school American Airlines plane? Case in point: the 26-year-old indie jean, newspaper cap, studded belt-wearing dude drinking lite beer out of a plastic cup who just returned from Houston after six days with his soon to be ex-girlfriend living with her dad and a 28-year-old “creepy” step mother who flirts? How do I know all this? Being a captive audience to his ongoing cell phone back n forths. Shut up, already!

Fun times. I am so so lucky to be experiencing this. seriously.

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